“Gee, it’s been a long time.  Oh, you’re wondering about that idea we discussed? Actually, I did put that project together (with someone else).”  These are words you don’t want to hear, as a business owner.  What if, instead, you heard “Oh, it’s great to hear from you!  I was just thinking about the last time we talked, and I have an idea.  I’m so glad you called/emailed/texted.”  Two completely different ways for a conversation to begin.

Of course, you want people to remember you…and yet you don’t want to bug them.  At least, that’s the thing you tell yourself that stops you from reaching out.  Is it too soon?  Is it too late?  Both of these ideas are actually excuses.  There are other ways to look at this. 

I wrote a book about excuses called “The Essential Excuse Handbook: 77 Ways to Keep From Doing Anything At All.” (It’s on Amazon.) In it, I discuss all the different “reasons” people have for not writing their books, and in fact these same excuses apply to literally Anything At All, including getting in touch with people for business conversations.  How is business done? By connections, of course.  How to keep them lively and productive?  By staying in touch.

Here is Excuse #23: “It’s too soon.”

You are scared!  That’s why you think it’s too soon.  It may actually be a little early, yet it is not too early to begin planning.  Even though as Eisenhower said, “Plans are useless, but planning is indispensable”, you can use the time to observe and make mental experiments.  By observing what’s happening for that person and their company, you can add value to the next conversation.  It shows you care. That’s planning, keeping the possibilities open so that plans can appear.

There is no ideal time for anything, so ask yourself again, “What makes me think it’s too soon?” Think of the interval as a time for planning.

Then there’s Excuse #24: “It’s too late.”

That’s regret, one of the greatest burdens in life.  Drop it! Think about the knowledge you gained the last time you contacted the person, about their style, their values, their needs.  Is it really too late?  Maybe, or maybe not.  How will you know if you don’t reach out? If it truly is too late for that person, then think of another person or company, use what you learned, and start over.  It’s never too late to start over.

Here’s the antidote for all of it: to be the person that people are glad to see, happy to hear from.  Reach out with curiosity, not from need.  Be ready to learn from every conversation.  Think carefully, and don’t overthink it.  Listen to your intuition and your gut feelings and find the balance.  When in doubt, go ahead and reach out.

And, that next time you reach out could be the one where that person says, “Thanks so much for staying in touch, it means so much to me.”